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List: 21 Signs I Saw Between Kingsville, Texas and Vancouver, Canada
  1. Krum, 11 miles (city sign north of Fort Worth, Texas)
    I bet they wear, like, only six-gallon hats there.
  2. Love's Travel Stops (across Texas)
    Where you can get a chili-dog and a buttplug!
  3. Muenster - A Unique German Community (45 miles north of Fort Worth, Texas)
    Do you mean relaxed, sloppy and not prone to military aggression?
  4. Wayne Harper's Great Food (Plano, Texas)
    And Corporate Branding Agency.
    The "more" stands for "mostly clean bathrooms."
  5. Free 80 oz Steak at Cattle Rustlers (Ardmore, Texas)
    That's like eating a small dog.
  6. Macrosurgical Vasectomy Reversal (outside Austin, Texas)
    That's right, baby, it'd be MACROsurgical for me, if you know what I mean.
  7. DW's Adult Video - "Paris Hilton is here!" (Texas/Oklahoma border)
    Not in person. Really? In person? Right there?! Oh my God, Paris Hilton, everybody.!
  8. Robertson's Ham Sandwiches - Real Beef Jerky and More! (south of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma)
    The "more" stands for "mostly clean bathrooms."
  9. Original Fried Pies (eastern Oklahoma)
    They must be so rock hard by now.
  10. Knipplemeier Chevrolet (Purcell, Kansas)
    I wish they sold t-shirts.
  11. The Liquor Lodge (Burlington, Kansas)
    Doesn't it just sound like a happy place?
  12. Sandbar - Live Mermaids Nightly (Lawrence, Kansas)
    Only nightly?!
  13. Chinese Super Buffet (Gothenburg, Nebraska)
    The worst superhero ever.
  14. Ole's Big Game Steakhouse and Lounge (Paxton, Nebraska)
    Do you think newcomers to English think it's a house actually made out of steak?
  15. Pitchfork Fondue Dinner Show (near Mt. Rushmore in South Dakota)
    Sounds a bit like the beginning of an e.e. cummings poem.
  16. Kremlin (city sign near Havre, Montana)
    I wonder if the right-wing militia groups in neighboring Idaho know about this?
  17. Norman's Western Wear (Cut Bank, Montana)
    Eh, I liked his Eastern Wear better.
  18. Cosmic Mystery Area - Mind boggling! (outside Sturgis, South Dakota)
    You know, in certain Southern states it's still illegal to boggle your mind, or have anyone boggle it for you.
  19. Weezie's Borscht Hut (Castlegar, B.C., Canada)
    Buy a franchise today!
  20. Ada's Quilting Cottage (Osoloos, B.C., Canada)
    I've heard that people have actually died of boredom there.
  21. Poon's Auto Repair (Vancouver, B.C., Canada)
    OK, no, this is the t-shirt I want.
 

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