Random

One

Brett: (while watching TV) Why does the evening news spend so much time on depressing news?

Carol: It’s just a bunch of fodder, really.

Brett: Do you know what "fodder" means?

Carol: (after pause) It’s short for "food for thought" isn’t it?

Brett: Are your serious? C’mon, what do you think the term "fodder" really refers to?

Carol: Your dad?

Two

Nancy: Did you read The Onion today?

Chab: Haven’t gotten to that yet. It’s only 11am and I’m still finishing up some personal email and trying to buy the new soundtrack from Jay & Silent Bob. Why? Am I missing something?

Nancy: Yeah, you need to read the story, "New Study Finds College Binge Drinking To Be A Blast"

Chab: Is that a real study?

Nancy: No, but it should be.

Three

Chab: Check out the set on that chick! (looking at a wedding photo of a woman falling out of her dress while reaching for the bouquet)

Jake: Hmmm....not so much. You have stepped into her allusion. They just look big cause the shaped part of her dress has fallen down.

Chab: Yeah, I just want to believe they are real

Jake: No you don’t, cause if they are, they’re probably majorly saggy. If they are real, they’re only standing up cause she’s in mid jump and momentum is holding them up.

Chab: Hmm...probably mid jump since there are tanning lines under and they probably sag over the lines..??

Jake: Outstanding observation. Dude, you are officially Ass Ventura, Porn Detective.